Where different minds meet

Hello, I am Anita Hempenius, an ADHD/nonADHD couples coach and the main thing that I do is translate:

Between ADHD brains and non-ADHD brains. Between facts and feelings. Between what someone meant to say and what their partner actually heard.

A woman with short gray hair wearing sunglasses rests her hand on her cheek and smiles while sitting in the driver's seat of a vehicle.

No matter how often I write this first page, I still end up giving either the ADHD partner or the nonADHD partner more space. And that is not what I want. The whole point of my ADHD/nonADHD couples coaching (including my year-long Spark & Steady couples programme) is that both partners have valid thoughts, feelings, experiences, and opinions.

Both of you are trying and both of you are misunderstood. Neither of you feels heard. One of you may be scanning for problems, the other for connections. Neither, or both, of you are at fault.

Both of you get to understand the lens you see through, made up of your background, your experiences, but also your brains, and the culture and family you grew up in. And you get to understand the other partner’s inner lens and experience. One of you may struggle carrying most of the invisible burden. The other one may struggle with overwhelm. Both truths can exist at the same time.

Both of you get your own dedicated content. It is not all about ADHD. It is about much more than that. Each of you get to talk to others like you. There are sessions for the ADHD partner and sessions for the nonADHD partner, as well as for you as a couple.

Both of you will work on understanding your distress, where it comes from, how to lessen it, and how to find joy back. Dysregulation happens to both of you.

Both of you get a language to talk to each other. I translate between the two of you in order for you to learn a common language.

If you want to know more about how I work, read my blogs or join me on one of the monthly ADHD couples events I host for ADHD UK. And if you decide you want to discuss options, do book a free introductory call.

(I also provide training, creative supervision, and other bits and bobs. Do have a look at Services)

ABOUT ME

Who my work is for

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    1-1 Coaching

    This space is for ADHD and AuDHD adults, especially those who discovered this about themselves later in life, and are ready for more than just “managing symptoms.” It is for people who want to truly understand how their brain works and begin shaping a life that fits them, rather than forcing themselves into something that never quite did.

    Learn More
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    Spark & Steady Couples

    This programme is for couples where one partner is ADHD and the other is neurotypical, or simply has a different neurotype.

    If you find yourselves stuck in the same patterns, miscommunications, or misunderstandings, this work invites a different perspective. Instead of seeing ADHD as the “problem,” we explore how your differences can become strengths within your relationship.

    Learn More
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    Neurodiversity Training

    I work with companies, small businesses, and groups of therapists, coaches, teachers, and other professionals who want more than a surface-level, “tick-box” approach to neurodiversity.

    This is for those who are willing to listen deeply and learn what it actually feels like to be neurodivergent in a world that often misunderstands it. Together, we explore a more human, neuro-affirmative approach that goes beyond theory and into lived experience.

    Learn More
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    Creative Supervision (for coaches)

    Supervision is a space to pause, reflect, and be supported in your work as a coach.

    You might bring client cases and want a wider perspective, or simply need somewhere to untangle your thoughts and find clarity again. Sometimes it is about your own wellbeing, because holding space for others can be quietly demanding, and you deserve support too.

    Click Here

What people have said

  • "When I started I was quite stuck, but I think the coaching has helped me to get in touch with my own capacity for change and agency."

    (From one of my 1:1 clients)

  • “Thank you again for creating a space where we could share openly and grow together.”

    (From a couple I worked with)

  • "It gave me an understanding of how my brain works, and tools to address my struggles. I can communicate my needs, and I have started to unmask… which feels very liberating."

    (From one of my 1:1 clients)

  • “I wanted to reach out to thank you for the training you delivered last week. It made a really positive impact on our team - everyone found your approach engaging and the content invaluable to our roles, workstreams, and future plans.”

    (From a training I provided)

  • "Very down to earth, practical, and addresses problem areas from the start."

    (From a 1:1 client)

  • "Everything was tailored to me… Anita made me feel at ease even when I became overwhelmed."

    (From a 1:1 client)

  • “The space to be able to look for positivity ways forward to address issues that have kept repeating themselves in our relationship for the past 15 years. And for the first time actually feeling like we both heard each other. The ability to be flexible and to be in the moment and not feel we had to stick to a set programme - it was tailors to our own needs”

    (From a couple I worked with)